1 Life, 0 Strength, 0 Bleed
When Shady Mechanic is is play, all vehicles are non-functional (ignore the
card text on the vehicle). Methuselahs controlling vehicles must lose 1 pool
during each of their untap phases until the vehicles are either destroyed or
taken out of play.
Lying Repair Station
You may tap the Lying Repair Station to tap any minion. That minion receives
a Reduction of the Quality of Life counter. When the number of Reduction of
the Quality of Life counters equal the capacity or cost of the minion, burn
that minion and receive 1 pool for every counter on the minion being burned.
Evil Dickhead, Manager
3 Life, 2 Strength, 1 bleed
During your prey's untap phase, if you have more pool than your prey, you
may tap Evil Dickhead to send a vampire your prey controls into torpor.
GIVE MIKE MONEY
When this card is played, you receive 2 victory points.
You must also send Mike Ooi the equivalent of $10 US or be
forced to play all sanctioned tournaments naked.
WACKY TORPOR TIME
Playable only when pizza arrives. All vampires go to torpor
and all allies are burned. Vampires cannot be rescued from
torpor or brought into the controlled region until all pizza
has been finished.
Put this card in play and name a set of Methuselahs. Those
Methuselahs now have +3 fun. A minion can take a (D) action
to burn this card - if he/she does so, remove that minion from
existence (rip that card in half).
THE 7th TRADITION
Untap a ready Prince/Justicar who can attempt to block an action
at +2 intercept. If the block is successful, the Methuselah
controlling the opposing minion burns 2 pool. Before combat
occurs, this Prince/Justicar creates a Progeny (non-unique vampire
with skill card) with 2 blood, places 3 blood from the Blood
Bank to a younger uncontrolled vampire, fills up to capacity, and
burns any vampires that have committed diablerie since your last
turn. The opposing minion then enters combat with the Progeny.
YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME?!?
Untap a ready Archbishop/Cardinal who can attempt to block an
action at +2 intercept. If the block is successful, the Methuselah
controlling the opposing minion burns 2 pool. Before combat occurs,
this Archbishop/Cardinal creates a Creation Rite (non-unique vampire
with skill card) with 2 blood, places 3 blood from the Blood Bank to
a younger uncontrolled vampire, fills up to capacity, and burns any
vampires that have committed diablerie since your last turn. The
opposing minion then enters combat with the Creation Rite. Can only
be played if there is a Prince in any Methuselah?s ready region.
YOU'RE A LOSER
Playable when a Methuselah is ousted or successfully withdraws.
Place X counters on this card, where X is the number of Victory
Points that Methuselah has accrued. That Methuselah then loses
all victory points they had accrued. Any minion may take an
action at -2 stealth to remove a counter from the card. Doing
so earns that minion?s Methuselah 6 pool and a victory point.
Burn this card when all counters have been removed, or when fire
is set to it and the Methuselah who played it.
Superior Text: You may play this card even if you are not playing
in the current game. Just grab the counters and run.
GET OUT OF TOWN
All Methuselahs in the current game must help you move or
you may burn all of their locations.
Reaction - Auspex
Inf: Reduce the acting minion's stealth by one
Sup: Reduce the acting minion's stealth to zero, and if
combat occurs, the acting minion's eardrums bleed for one damage.
Reaction - Obtenebration
Inf: Only usable by a non-blocking minion if the acting minion
has been successfully blocked but before combat occurs. Both minions
involved in combat go to torpor.
Sup: As above, and the acting minion's controller must say, "hey Hey
HEY! It's FAT ALBERT!" or lose 3 pool.
"I should have tried Slim-Fast!!!" - Moncada, at the end of
Combat - Dementation
Inf: Only usable if this minion has a gun. Allows this minion
to hold the gun sideways and strike with the gun with First
Strike, but only at close range.
Sup: Allows this minion to strike with First Strike as if he
had a .44 Magnum (2R) by using his first two fingers.
Unique Master - requires Animalism
Place this on an Army of Rats in play. That Army of Rats will
"hit" for three pool instead of one.
Tap all minions with retainers.
"Master, the airline lost you again!" - Renfield
Kit Kat Bar
Combat - Potence
Just like Decapitate, but you break them in half like a...
Lat-ino Pop Star
Master, only playable on Ricki Van Dempsy (Gangrel).
Turns Ricki Van Dempsy into Ricky Martin. Ricky Martin will not
contest with a copy of Ricki Van Dempsy. Ricky Martin suffers
Master Out of Turn- 5 pool
Choose a minion in combat. That minion has the equivalent of
two Disarms and two DeLeggings. That minion, if ready, cannot
act and must be the first minion who attempts to block actions
directed against its controller. "What do you call a Cainite
with no arms and no legs lying in front of a door? No wait,
did I screw that one up?" - Ozmo
Equipment - 3 pool
The minion with this equipment may burn it to disgust the other players.
Pat's on the Back
Master Out-of-Turn - Toreador Anti-tribu
Increase the bleed of another Methuselah by X, where X is the
number of your fingers currently in an orifice of your choice.
Master - Unique Location - 4 pool
You have created a new Middle Eastern OPEC nation, which you control.
During a Methuselah's untap phase (except yours), all vehicles must
be repaid for or they are burned.
S-A-T ur D-A-Y (night)
Inf: Burn either the Inbase Discotek, the Hungry Coyote, or The Rack.
Sup: As above, at +1 stealth.
Tat for Tits
Equipment - Unique Location - 3 blood
The minion with this location can force an opposing minion in
combat to play Superiors at the inferior. If the opposing minion
attempts to play Inferiors, they can be cancelled altogether.
"It's those damn tassels, they do it everytime!" - Ulugh Beg, the Peeper
Vat o' Blood
Master - Animalism
Allows you to drench all your currently controlled cards in ketchup
while singing "Hungry Like the Wolf"
Wat's Up, Doc?
Combat - Animalism
Inf: This vampire's teeth do aggravated damage.
Sup: Strike: Combat Ends. The opposing minion goes to Torpor in
your Predator's Predator's Torpor Region, also known as Kukamunga.
You cannot burn the opposing minion as a result of this combat.
Ally - 3 pool
5 Life 2 Hand Damage -2 Bleed
This is was an AD&D creature who wandered into some WofTC
wormhole and ended up in V:TES.
"Where the hell am I? I eat rocks." - Xat
Master - Malkavian - Only playable in Boston, or when in a game
with someone from Boston (i.e. Ben Peal)
First Methuselah to repahk their cah in a puddle wins 6 pool.